Businesses love that they give people the opportunity to become part of their workplace family. They want to feel connected to all the warm feelings and to know that their recruits will be part of an enjoyable team. Most people spend more time with their family at home than at work, so a sense that they belong is essential for motivation, engagement and productivity.
Now, any message such as “we are like one big family”, is a warning to potential and current employees. This is interpreted as an indication that the employer considers you to be at least as important as your family. The boundaries between work and home are blurred and you will never be able to switch off. When you become a parent, your expectations change. You have an obligation to make sacrifices, and to do what needs to be accomplished.
This is a big no-no. It’s a no-no.
Joshua Luna, writing for Harvard Business Review pointed out three specific issues. The blurring of personal and professional commitments (you can’t switch off from your family obligations); an overly loyal attitude (going beyond the call of duty) that might be effective in the short term, but leads to burnout and stress; and a power imbalance, where the ‘family tag’ implies the bosses as parents and the rest of the staff as children.
Under the guise caring and warmth there are the conditions for exploitation. A sense of duty, an increase in demands and expectations, leading to emotional guilt, and excessive work. A worker who feels like they are part of a family may also expect to feel cheated, not empowered, and even to be spoon-fed. They might think it is okay to be difficult or to share too much with their colleagues. Most families will have some dysfunction.
What kind of culture is best to promote if the “family” message doesn’t work anymore?
Joshua Luna argues for a “sports team approach”: “you maintain a culture of collectiveness, belonging and shared values while outlining a “performance-driven culture” that respects this transactional relationship.” Define high performance, be clear on what team roles are, with clear boundaries about what is expected, and accept that the game ends when the whistle blows.
The basic outline of the sports analogy seems to work up to a certain extent. It can feel a bit too simplistic. There has never been a shortage of egos that are problematic, conflicts and self-obsession in sports. When it comes to achieving success at work, and the goals and objectives of an organization, ‘winning’ is key.
CMP works with employers to develop Clear Air cultures. What matters is the wider sense of belonging to a “good” culture. It’s not a workplace with a fabricated ‘brand’, or a set of messages to which people must adhere. A practical, mature culture built on transparency and honesty is more appropriate. Real practices that support the truth and constant testing of this truth.
There are too many gaps between the values and expectations of an organisation and what employees actually experience. Clear Air encourages employees to speak up and be themselves, because they feel respected and valued. They also know that their grievances, differences of opinion and personality clashes, as well as any other concerns, will be handled in a fair and reasonable manner. The management spends time and effort on helping those who do not know how to adhere to the standards and disciplining others who fail.
Clear Air culture is built by developing conversation skills within an organization, equipping employees with the tools to handle difficult conversations and situations, exploring Psychological Safety levels (using tools such as Neutral Assessment) and letting them know that any grievances they may have will be addressed in a straightforward and constructive manner, through dialogue and mediation.
Paul O’Donnell, Managing Director at workplace relationships experts CMP, www.cmp-solutions.com
The original HR News article Why Employees Don’t Want to Be Part of a “Family” appeared.
