Contrary to popular misconceptions, returning mothers are not less dedicated or absent. They’ve experienced a life-changing experience that has strengthened their resolve and made them capable of taking on any new challenge. These women want to reclaim both their professional identity and their new role as mother.
My coaching practice has helped me support many women in their transition back to the workplace. All my clients, whether they receive coaching as part of their company’s maternity benefit package or privately, gain from the space for reflection that coaching offers. This is an opportunity for them to reflect on the changes that have occurred in their lives, and to plan their return to their jobs.
Themes that I see repeatedly in my coaching sessions with clients who are expecting include:
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Resetting productivity
In our flexible world, time management must be rethought to accommodate new schedules such as nursery drop-offs or office days. My clients want both to be there for their children’s important moments and to contribute to work initiatives.
Together with my clients, we work to redefine achievable goals and adjust work patterns. We explore different techniques – from analysing the time spent to identifying the optimal times for various types of tasks. Inspire by Dan Pink’s ‘When’ book, I share that analytical tasks are best performed in the morning peak hours while creative tasks are most effective later in the afternoon recovery period.
I encourage my clients embrace the idea of “wearing different hats” – being fully engaged in their roles as parents when they are with their children, and as professionals when at work. This mental shift allows you to manage the dual roles better.
Coaching is a place where you can re-evaluate how to work so that they are beneficial for you and your business. Lily, a client who recently returned to three days of work a week, is a good example. She initially worked on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday. However, through coaching, we learned that this schedule created resentment toward her work as it interfered with the time she spent with her newborn. She found it difficult to wear multiple hats at once during the week. It was easier to keep one hat on at a given time. So she changed her schedule to Tuesday to Thursday. This has worked better for her and allowed her to concentrate on just one hat.
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Building Confidence
Returners’ confidence levels can vary. Some women are extremely confident in their role as mothers, but they have lost confidence professionally due to an extended absence. Some women are eager to return and brimming over with confidence. However, they find that their organisations do not offer the same level responsibility as before.
Recent coaching sessions have focused on helping clients rebuild their self-confidence through acknowledging past achievements and focusing in the moment. Between sessions, we discuss practical tips and assignements to help clients grow their confidence. They usually include:
- Use affirmations for motivation. You can use simple affirmations like ‘you can do this’ or “I can handle it”. Positive language and saying the right things to ourselves can be life affirming. Each morning, give yourself a big high-five or say something that you find powerful.
- List Your Strengths. You may have received positive feedback for being a good speaker. Do you have a calm and serene nature that is admired by other people? Confidence is directly related to our ability to recognise and use our strengths to the best of their advantage.
- Motivation is based on achievement, so focus on your successes. Record your daily wins to keep yourself motivated. You will be motivated to do even more when you feel the momentum.
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Rekindling motivation
After having a baby, motivation often changes. Some women may feel motivated to work more or less because of the new importance placed on their family. Others might think that work no longer matters. Most of my clients are still looking for fulfillment and enjoyment at work. This may be even more so now that they have a second significant role in life.
Before focusing on growth factors like additional responsibilities, promotion and development opportunities, it is important to manage the practical aspects of work hours and workplace environment. I encourage HR professionals and the businesses with which I work to recognize the enormous personal growth that comes from parenthood, something I believe is an opportunity not to be overlooked.
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Navigation change
During maternity leave, both the returning employee and the company undergo change. Communication is crucial during this transitional period. It is important to plan Keep in Touch Days (KITs) strategically in order to maximize their value.
To help clients better understand their emotions, I frequently refer to the Elisabeth Kubler Ross change curve. This is a normal flow of emotions during change. From shock and denial, to experimentation, and finally integration.
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Communication is important
It is important that returners and employers have an open and honest dialogue. Both parties must acknowledge that productivity levels may vary and there could be peaks and valleys in the short-term. The long-term advantages of keeping these valued employees outweigh any temporary instabilities.
Returners are a great asset to employers. When these employees become parents, their stability and institutional expertise will be far superior to that of new hires. Not to mention, they’ll save on recruitment and training costs.
As a coach, my role is to create a space where returners can express their vision and needs for returning to work. By facilitating the process, I bridge the communication gaps between returners, their employers and myself, creating a smooth transition for everyone.
It’s not only about making the transition easier, but also about unlocking the potential of an extremely valuable workforce. Employers can create a diverse, motivated and experienced team by investing in returning employees through coaching and support.
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